No more spoons

It started with a story I read years ago. A manager unsure what to do with an employee who delivered amazing work but kept arriving late. Eventually, she broke down and said she just didn’t have the mental energy. Someone in the comments offered: “She just didn’t have enough spoons left in the drawer.” That phrase stuck with me.

We all have spoons. Some days we have a drawer full. Some days we’re running low. And sometimes, we look in the drawer and… nothing. No spoons left.

In our house, this became a metaphor. It’s how we talk about energy, emotional resilience, and capacity. It’s how we make space for each other when one of us feels stretched too thin to do the thing, even if it’s something we care about.

It’s how my eight-year-old told me, “I don’t have many spoons left, and I don’t want to give one to that.” And I understood. Instantly. No explanation needed.

The beauty of the spoon metaphor is that it softens the weight of what you’re trying to say. You don’t have to explain the why. You don’t have to find the right words to describe burnout, sadness, or overwhelm. Words that often feel too big or too sharp. You just say: “I have no spoons left.” Or: “I want to keep my last spoon for something else.”

We use it a lot, especially now, as the school year ends, work intensifies, and we count down to summer. We’re all running low. Some days, the drawer is rattling empty. And that’s okay.

This metaphor gave us a language for moments when words feel too heavy. A way to share something vulnerable without making it harder than it needs to be.

So if you're struggling, or if someone close to you is, maybe try it:“I have no spoons today.” Sometimes, that’s all that needs to be said.